Hey Guys, 

So you probebly must be thinking ''who are you or  what happend?'' and here comes the explanation.
so today an awesome guy named @BOOmstick helped me out. i was bored so i went on NG chat and some weird conversation came lose because of my name MinecraftGirl2 and of course i knew it was weird. i told him it was a mistake i made when i made this account and he gave me a supporter date for a day or so and i was so suprised.

I imeadiatly erased my old name and mistake i made years ago and changed it to something more creative ^_^ and there it goes from MinecraftGirl2 to NyanaCreations. i hope you all like it. this was just a little update sorry ^_^ but soon there will be more to share. anyway i hope your all having an amezing day.

~N

Here are some songs to enjoy ^_^

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OuodXAE-070

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfCz0aPikhk

Hey Guys, 

So in one of the next weeks i am going to comic con for the first time. as well as i am going for the first time to a convention where i cosplay with my friend (and kinda crush) i made a suprise for her with little key chanes i made in the color of the persons we are cosplaying. the fun part is that those are a couple as well. probebly nobody has an idea what i am talking about or atleast what cosplay i am going to do ^_^ so here is it: 
we are playing as Victor and Yuri from Yuri on ice. i am playing as Yuri (because i am the smallest one and i like him alot) and she is Victor. it is her favorite character and she is the tallest of the two of us so we got both our favorite character. i hope we can see alot of more Yuri on Ice cosplayers on that weekend. i hope as well that i will see alot of awesome cosplayers i am super excited to go because i have been waiting for this to happpen for years. and the most awesome part is that i am going to see a really good friend of mine and that makes it even better so that is awesome. i will update you all when everything happened and mabey share some pictures of the con itself. i am super excited to share the stories i have than ^_^

anyway for now i am going to write a little story. New Friends next part is almost finished but not done yet it will hopefully be done in the next week. anyway enjoy the story ^_^

The Story: 

And again i am awake because i can't sleep. the thoughts of her go through my mind. the things she always does are so freaking cute. i know she is gay and doesn't like boys at all but will she like me? i am her best friend but what if she doesn't like me at all. i know i just grow some balls and say it to her but you know it's harder than you think. i am not the type of person that likes one thign and i deventually am not the typical person someone expects me to be. i am the oppisent of most things so it could be kinda weird if we where toghter.

today she forgot her books at home and because she most of the time sits next to me we had to share my book. it was nice seeing her smile when i offered my book to share. if i didn't the proffecor probebly put her next to a guy and she doesn't want that because the only guy that was sitting on his own was kinda a douchbag. he always does things that or annoy the shit out of the teacher or he tries to get other people mad so he usually pretty onnying and i wouldn't want anything to do with him to be honest. he also has a little group of friends that are trouble makers and i know she doesn't like that at all and tries to stay away from them as much as possible.  

anyway after that lesson we had lunch again. of course we where standing at a table the two off us and usually our little group of two guys that are in the same class as us and my friends usually come hang out around the table as well. it is suprising how from zero friends in the beginning of the year i went to so many friends. i didn't expect that but it is nice. but i only have this year with everyone and than i have to go to the next school and have to make new friends again so that sucks alot. i hope i'll see a couple of them still around that would be really nice.

i made a suprise for her it are 2 bracelets and earlier this year i made a little book that was called: the power of words i think atleast it was called that. she really like that. mabey i could ask her out and give her the bracelet when we do. but who knows it are just fantasys although they are pretty nice onces. 

I put on my ear buds and seach from some relaxing music. i deside to put on the piano covers from the anime Your Lie in April. they have some really awesome and relaxing piano music, after a couple minutes i close my eyes and lissening to the music i slowly fall asleep. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzTCeEj455A

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hywHNmUssM4

(remember if you want to give me an idea of what to draw you can tell me on my forum and i will do my best to draw somethimg awesome ^_^  https://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/topic/1426954#bbspost26110469_post_text )

Hey Guy's,

So i am not done with the story yet because i have been caught up in alot of stuff and have been super busy but a little while ago i gave an intervieuw to @KungFuSpaceBarbarian and i asked him to answer the same quistion and if i could post it. i think this would be fun to do and everyone gets to know him a little bit better. if you want to see my intervieuw you can go to his post and read it there ;) anyway here we go, hope you enjoy this intervieuw with @KungFuSpaceBarbarian

What do you create? Art, cartoons, music, games, etc?
I make cartoons and old school text adventure games. I’m currently focusing all my energy on a fantasy series called Crypt Shyfter.

What inspires you to create?
The D&D handbooks and RPG threads on reddit are a great starting place for generating fantasy adventure ideas. I’m also inspired by other creators, YouTubers, filmmakers, artists, cartoonists, and businessmen.

How do you keep yourself motivated? Do you work in short bursts of inspiration or do you have a daily routine?
I don’t have a “routine” but I do impose very strict deadlines on myself. My current deadline system is to write a minimum of 500 words per day. It’s pretty arbitrary but it keeps me honest.
Some days I write 500 words as soon as I wake up and then don’t write anything else for the rest of the day. Other times I’m struggling until 10pm to get my words done. Some glorious days I write 2 or 3 thousand words and forget to eat or get up to go to the bathroom. That’s when I’m in the zone. And of course sometimes I just say “fuck it” and skip for the day. But I try really hard to hit all my deadlines.

What do you do when you hit a creative block?
Usually I’ll sit down with a blank page and just start writing anything that pops into my head. It doesn’t matter how stupid my writing is, I just need to get my brain accustomed to putting words on a page. Usually that’s enough to break the block a little bit and allow some ideas to flow freely.
Other times I’ll start reading inspiring, cheesy, motivational articles online to give me a good kick in the ass.

How do you deal with trolls online and in real life?
I pretend it doesn’t affect me when I get trolled (I think all creators make that claim), but of course it does.
When someone gives you a shitty comment, that fucks up your day. Instead of responding emotionally in the heat of the moment, I try to put myself in the head of a kung fu space barbarian and answer in his voice. That doesn’t always work out, but I try.
KFSB  enjoys antagonizing troll-folk. It makes it so much easier to respond to any positive or negative criticism when you’re responding as a character and not as yourself. I like to think some of the over-the-top responses to trolls get a few chuckles out of any of my readers who skim through the comments after playing a game.

Have you ever created something you thought turned out pretty bad but then when you posted it online everyone else liked it more than your favorite creations? Why do you think that happens?
I’m always surprised when one of my projects that I consider to be “average” quality gets more attention than I expected, and I get a little bummed out when a project I spent a lot of time on and think is really awesome doesn’t get as much recognition.
I’m not sure why it happens that way- different tastes, maybe, or possibly I just get more attached to the things I spend more time on even though that doesn’t necessarily make them “better.”

Has rejection ever affected your creative process?
Yes. Rejection is a wonderful motivator. I won’t get into any details… *cough* film school *cough* but yeah- rejection has definitely affected my creative process.

What is the best advice you ever received?
Consistency is key. Also, don’t try to make a viral hit- make a series to keep your audience coming back for more.

What do you do when you’re not creating or posting on Newgrounds? Do you have a job? Are you a student?
I’m just a regular dude. When I’m not at work (I run financial reports at a healthcare payments company), I’m usually sitting on the couch with a glass of wine and my iPad next to my wife and our dog. Other times I can be found playing video games or going on hikes.

What does the internet mean to you?
Porn! Wait- what?
Kidding.
No I’m not.
The internet is an amazing way to share ideas and stories with one another. It’s also a way to earn a little extra cash on the side, which is pretty cool. Some even claim that little trickle of cash can be turned into a flowing river of dollar bills, but I have yet to experience that.

Why Newgrounds?
Remember that Jazza documentary? Yeah, that was what got the ball rolling for me. Also, when I post videos on YouTube and Newgrounds, I get 4-5 views on YT and 400-500 views on NG… and comments! Newgrounds is a much more welcoming community than YouTube. Lately it’s become more than just a place to post videos though, I’ve started to make friends on NG and consider it to be my home on the internet.

What is your favorite accomplishment? Post a link if it’s available online!
This kung fu movie I made with my best friends: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0f4ePC6nyqg

Do you enjoy sharing your work with others or do you prefer to go unnoticed? Why?
Hmmm….. I think I could be happy going unnoticed forever. I like having a private life. That’s why I write under a pen name and have a wacky username online. Responding to criticism, either good or bad, is also awkward and I don’t always know what to say.
All that being said, I gotta be honest- I have the best players / readers anyone could ever ask for. I’m dead serious- a lot of creators would kill to get the kind, thoughtful, in-depth comments I receive on my games and I do not take that for granted for one second. You guys are seriously badass

What do you wish to accomplish with your art? Is it a hobby or do you plan on making it a career?
If I can make someone forget about their shitty day and escape from the real world for a while, then it’s all worth it. Actually, based on a few comments and PMs I’ve received, I have already achieved that goal… but now I want to reach more people to make their days better too!
Making cartoons and games is just a hobby right now, and to be honest I am content with that. I’m not thrilled to be working a “day job” but my job really isn’t that bad. If I could support myself 100% through making games and movies and writing books and scripts, that would be a dream come true. But for right now I’m happy to have it as a fun little hobby.

Do you ever feel that you have to censor your creativity because you don’t want to offend anyone?
In a way, yes. I like that in a text game ANYONE can visualize themselves as the hero, so I try to be as inclusive as I can when writing my games. Text adventures are niche enough… I don’t need to include offensive jokes that drive off half the people who might actually be interested in playing a text game.
For me, it doesn’t matter if you’re a dude or a chick, what color your skin is, or what religion you follow; I like to keep all of my descriptions vague enough that you aren’t forced to visualize a stereotypical European fantasy filled with a bunch of white dudes, but still specific enough to give you a very clear idea of what’s happening in each scene.
For example, General Rawhide is described as a “grizzled old war hero.” That’s it. Is he a white dude? A black guy? Is he Asian? It’s up to you as the reader to fill that in- and nobody who reads it is wrong! Everyone sees their own version of a “grizzled old war hero,” just like everyone’s “you” in the game is completely unique- it’s literally YOU!
I think it’s awesome that I get comments from dudes and chicks coming from all sorts of backgrounds and they all have fun playing the games. I’d hate to fuck that all up by making another bland, stereotypical white male fantasy game.

Do you have your own “style” or do you just make whatever feels right at the time?
I think I’m starting to develop a style. In terms of art, I have my digital paper cutout style, but that still needs improvement. And my text games definitely have a style, which is this: short paragraphs and quirky humor.

Do you believe it’s important to get good reviews and have lots of followers or is just doing what you love to do enough to justify your work?
From a “personal satisfaction” standpoint, I don’t care about reviews. It’s not like I’m going to stop making things just because people don’t like the end result- I’m in love with the process of creation, so I’m still going to spend my free time making things whether people like them or not.
However, I want to make a career out of creating things one day, so it is definitely important to have good reviews for that. We live in a world where everything from movies to restaurant Yelp reviews are rated on a scale of 1 to 5. If you have a 1-star review you are FUCKED.
Did you know Uber drivers need to maintain a 4.6 out of 5 star rating? 4.6 OUT OF 5! That is INSANE! They need to be virtually perfect in order to keep working for Uber. Here’s what their website says:
You are encouraged to maintain at least a 4.6 average over your most recent 100 trips.
If your average rating is between a 4.3 and a 4.6 after your first 25 trips, you will need to improve your average rating to a 4.6 over the next 25 trips.
If your rating over the most recent 100 trips is below a 4.6, your profile may be at risk of deactivation.Since when is 4 stars bad??? But that’s how it works today, and I’m not ignorant to that fact. So yeah, it’s vitally important to have good reviews. 
What’s the current YouTube statistic? Something like 100 hours of video is uploaded every minute? If you tried to watch it all you’d fall behind 4 days for every minute you were watching! Why would some stranger on the internet waste their time watching your 2-star movie when they could be watching another completely random 5-star movie instead?
On the same note, you’re also far more likely to click subscribe on an artist’s channel if you see they’ve got 25,000 subscribers vs. the guy who’s only got 16 subscribers. It’s just an automatic bias we have in our heads- this is good and worth watching, this is bad so I won’t bother.
Reviews and followers are important because OTHER PEOPLE perceive them as being important. You need good reviews to get noticed in the first place, otherwise your work will just get lost in the shuffle. It’s all a numbers game, but good reviews and big numbers are the tickets that get you in the door.

Do you ever find yourself limited by the materials that you have available?
I’d like a faster computer to help with rendering and exporting things more quickly, but otherwise I’m not struggling to make what I want from a technical standpoint. The sole reason my quality falls short is that my talent level isn’t there yet, not that I don’t have the right tools. But that’s something I can improve with time.
Speaking of time- it’s time, more than materials, that I feel limited by. There are so many things I want to accomplish, but I still only have 24 hours in a day. Sleeping and working at my day job take up most of those hours, so finding the time to squeeze in creative projects is tough. Prioritizing which projects get worked on and which ones get abandoned due to lack of time is even tougher.

What advice would you give someone just starting out?
Always make shit. Be consistent. Don’t let the bastards grind you down.

I hope all of you enjoyed reading that (it was alot i know :p ) anyway soon the story will be done or atleast the next part so keep your hopes up i haven't forgoten about it ^_^ anyway i hope you all have a wonderfull day (here is some music you can enjoy. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZqnMmwnMNo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsUVbPffe_w

Hey guy's 

so it took some time but i am feeling alot better than before this. today i desided to write some more of the story and try to make the next part as well. for the onces that are hoping i will write it right now you will have to wait a little. i am going to put the whole story in a Word document and try to save it. as well as read it again so i will not forget the inportant details i might put in there. i am going to do my best to post the next part of New Friends <3 in the next couple days so you all can enjoy the new parts i write for this exciting story as well as i missed writing alot so i am going to start again ^_^ 

okay wish me luck with writing (sorry for this short update i litterly never do that, pretty weird) but i am going to write now hope you'll enjoy the next part when it comes out and if you have any ideas for the story don't be shy and tell me i would love to hear them ^_^ 

okay everyone have a wonderfull day and enjoy this relaxed music :D

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrzErTSxxq4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAfWL-A1dBk

Hey Guys,

So this week i haven’t been feeling to well. I have a headache, my stomach hurts and I’m kinda dizzy and some other things I am not going to go into. But I have been really busy. With not feeling to well and the fact that I am most of the time busy with school it’s been really hard to be active on here. I try my best but it’s a bit harder than it seems. Anyway I hope after this week I will feel better and can be as active as I first was but I first have to recover from this as well as have a bit more time than I have now. I hope you all are okay with that, I try my best to still post something especially with Inktober because I wanted to participate in that but it’s a bit hard. Mabey I will for the first time ever participate but not do it every day but once a week, that would be a lot of fun to do. I hope I can make time for that ^_^

Anyway maybe you haven’t seen yet but I have 32 fans O_O when I saw that I was so surprised and so happy. I never thought I could have so many people care or even want to see my work. This means a lot to me and thanks to everyone who follows me or even has seen some things of what I can do. I hope I will go a long way from here but until now thanks so much you made me really happy. 

And to these people I will say extra thank you for following me ^_^
(and if your new here don’t forget to check these amazing people)

Anyway here are the names of all the awesome people who have been supporting me from the beginning or a couple weeks ^_^

@botnot435
@CoolNinjaTMNTfan
@Distroyer120
@GobSmacked
@JustAPunnyGuy

@JamesHatfeld
@PancakePocket
@StaticSkull
@Unicorns223
@Alexwilsoncomposer

@MassGas
@3AceNG
@Carlos01
@Croude
@drake-rex

@HazzaTimmy
@JMations98
@LunacyOfficial
@Mochipet
@Skiddle

@stewardhklarlover
@WiLD11
@Ante45
@Cholos
@DarkDruid5

@G4CEsz-Officia
@Jabicho
@M4dMonst3r
@Mr-Insanity97
@ss4GOKU890

@Tadiel
@MchectorII

Thanks to all of you and i hope we will all go a long way ^_^

Anyway when i get better i will write more of the story of New Friends <3 so keep looking forward to that ^_^

now enjoy this music and have an awesome day ;) 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAOMIH7cgh0

Hey Guy's 

So a bit of the topic but i entered the story writing contest on NG. i thought because i wrote already alot i could enter for the contest to show my skills and just have alot of fun ^_^ i wrote alot and it's probebly just the first part of the story. i just really wanted to share this. in my next post i will continue with my story of ''New Friends <3'' because i really enjoy writing that. just enjoy this little side story and next time i'll continue the other story. 

i hope you all like it ^_^

My Helloween Contest story:

His arms are tied, his feet are tied. his eyes are twitching like he has a terrible nightmare right now. i put my hand slowly on his head. he is not awake right now but that will come soon. i smile because the thoughts going trough my head are so awefull it makes my skin crawl. i turn his head slightly to the right and see how his beautiful face glows in the light. i put a nail on his cheek and slowly scratch my nail down to his chin.

i let his head go and he goes into a sleeping position on the chair. of course he is stuck so he looks a bit goofy like if your sleeping in a car without leaning against something. i turn around and see the washing machine, of course i wouldn't use it for that but for something else. of course i leave it alone and walk to a small table that is near the wall. there is a silver plate on the table. most people could use it for cookies or put a vace on it or something but me i use it for something much more interesting. there are all kind of sharp objects on the table. i grab a little knife and play with it in my hand while walking up to the guy. I’m so curious how my new toys will work on my players.

‘'sweetheart wake up, it's time to play' i hide the knife behind my back and try to wake the guy up. He doesn’t wake up, he is probebly in a deepsleeper but with bit of pushing him around i find a way to wake him up. i grab a cup of a special drink i made for him. the smell is so strong and disgusting i can not even hold it close but if this is the only way it has to happen it has to be done. i slowly put the cup underneath his nose of the guy and after a couple seconds later he almost jumps out of his seat. luckly i tied him down so the only thing that happens is that he falls over. i giggle a bit and put his chair back in the position it was standing in.

'haha welcome back' the guy looks confused like he doesn't know what happend before. he looks around the room but there is not alot to see. the only thing he could see was the washing machine, a little table with my new favorite toys and in the middle of the room a table with 4 chairs around it. 'w...w...whe...where am i?' he almost can't speak because he is in shock but i love to answer it. 'aahhww you don't remember? what a pity, you made a promise remember. just like the other two' he looks confused and tries to look around if he can see if there are any other people. 'hahaha aaahww nonono they are not here they are upstairs sleeping, unfortuanally i couldn't bring them downstairs with you strugeling. You really where a fighter but you know you couldn’t win from me. there is alot more than just my pretty face, the first hour i could take you but you got annoying  so i gave you some sleeping pills, and they worked well' he looks at me like i'm a ghost and did somthing horrible.

'why do you look so scared and angry i didn't do anything wrong you know, but in the next hour you will i'm sure' his eyes widen because he hears the most terrifying voice in his life. 'come come i'll set you down at the table and you can choose even witch side you can sit on' i smile at him and he still  doesn't react on what i'm saying. 'hmm.... your not really a talker, that suprises me for how you treated the girls around the school... i gues some situations just make you weak right? hahaha aaahww poor you if you kept your promise this would have never happend' he looks at me confused like i said some riddle but i igore it and drag his chair to the table. i kick one chair away so i can put his chair in his place. 'you know i have to get the other two now okay? i expect you to stay right here and not move, do you understand?' he nods and i am glad he does. 'good you wouldn't want me to play with you first right? i would love to test some new sharp toys i got but it would be such a waste'

i pull a little staircase from the wall and walk upstairs. the guy seems like a f*ckboy but you will never know how he will do with gambeling. he loves to keep people under control but can he save his life with that or not. we will see. finally i come upstairs and walk towards the kitchen where a guy and a girl lay on the ground. i pull the guy over my shoulder and hold the girl in my arms. they are both very light what i didn't expect that but, it's a pleasant suprise. they came to visit an hour ago and they where the perfect mach to join my game so i gave them something to drink with the sleeping pill in it. the pill worked really fast and i could get myself prepaired, after all i'm the card master.

I drag the two down stairs and tie them both down to a chair. i walk around again to find the drink who woke up the first one. it wasn't long until both of them woke up, they where just as confused as the first one was but this time the girl started screaming. she was yough but she couldn't keep still so i needed to take some measures. i grabbed a peace of clothl and walked behind her chair.

i took the peace of cloth and tied her mouth shut. of course she tried to scream but it wasn't effective. 'you know little girl we are going to play a game. i'm sure you like games right?' she nods her head. 'hmm... i'm suprised. why are you screaming than? the walls are sound proof so nobody can hear you, so stop screaming!! or your the first one to lose some limbs okay' the girl imeaditly is quite and nods she didn't want that.

i walk back and look at the table all three are there and all my things are set up. now we can start the game. i'm so excited. 'welcome all of you, you probebly wonder why your here right? i can explain hihi. you made a promise somewhere with me and you broke it after getting 3 chances. you agreed you would play a deadly mach if you would break the promise and here we are. of course you don't remember how you got here and what your promise was but you'll get to know when your last letter dissapears'’ they all look shocked like i'm some crazy ring master but of course i'm not. i'm nuts but not crazy those are not the same thing right? hmm... doesn't matter. they did somthing and they agreed it's there fault that they ended up here.

i walk around the table and stop by one of the guys. ''hihihi your a pretty boy but will that save you?'' i start petting his head like he is a dog or car i own. ''so here are the rules, it's a simple game that a friend told me of. so here are the rules:’’

‘’the master will lay down 5 cards. On those cards are 5 symbols. A heart, cross, triangel, cirkel and one line. The master so me can lay the cards down in any order they want. I will lay the cards face down so you can’t see what order i placed them in. after i layed the cards down, you all choose your order to place the same cards in. you also will face them down. If everyone is done placing the cards face down i will first turn the cards upwards so you can see what order i put the cards in. i hope for you all that you will have the same order as me. if you have the most cards correct you win and if you have have less cards right than everyone else you lose and gain a letter of the word LOSER. This is the fun part though. If you gain a letter the winner will deside what part of you will be cut off. And the game ends when someone gets the full word LOSER. If that happends the two survivers deside how the loser will end up dead. It’s an easy and fun game to play don’t you think hihihi’’

All of there faces look terrified. Haha it’s so fun to see that face but it will be even more fun when the game starts so we have to start soon. I walk around and one by one i release a hand and put them to a chain. They are still stuck but now atleast they can place there cards and turn them if needed.

‘’good luck you will need it. i hope we have a wonderfull game but to find out we have to start playing hahaha’’ i give them all there 5 cards and now we can start. ‘’let the game begin’’

~N

(i hope you all enjoyed that ^_^ here is some music to lissen to)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M0KgNx8Jw-I

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4pLYhIc-Es

Hey Guys, 

So i desided to make another part of the story because i have some time left in the day. and since i got some positive feedback and compliments from people i know i wanted to continues, btw i want to thank a couple people because they have been a big help the last months. so here we go thanks to: 

@EvanScale : Thank you for helping me with my art. you give me really helpfull tips as well as motivation to keep going with my art and  that means alot to me. your an inspiration to me to keep going with my art and keep doing what i love. so thank you again for that. 

@Jabicho : Thank you for giving awesomly piano music that some of the days just brings me out of the worst mood. and also thank you for giving positive feedback down in the comments. it gives me hope to continue writing and of course thanks for the little talks we had somthimes ^_^

@JamesHatfeld : Thank you for staying by my side for all this time. after a while of talking we became better friends. even though somthimes it goes wrong and we have a little argument (like normal people have somthimes) you stick by my side and support me through hard and easy times. you keep me motivated for most things and even offers to help if needed and give awesome advice. just thank you for being my friend for so long ^_^

@JohnEarthBreathGames : Thank you for being there whenever you where there. we had some times but we are still friends. mabey i don't talk to you alot anymore but with you i was busy with a game for the first time and that changed alot so thank you for the good times. 

@MassGas : And thank you for being there. i don't know you for very long but the talks we have are awesome and i enjoy them so much. i love the goofy stuff we talk about and just you being around. i hope i'll get to know you more in the future ^_^

anyway Thank you all and all my fans who have sticked with me until now. you all are so amezing and i appreaciate all of you being here. it means the world to me that i have come so far and that is mindblowing. so thank all of the people who believe in me and have supported me until now ^_^

anyway i'm going to further and i'm done with the sappy stuff :P so i'll continue the story some of you have been waiting for to read. so here we go. 
Last time: 

after a couple minutes of cuddeling i hear Sara. ''LYLIAN!!! why did you have to blow up my ears?!?!?''  i see Lylian rushing over to the phone. ''sorry Sara, i just saw Sam in her outfit for the first time it's unbelievible, you should hurry up'' i hear Sara giggling and she responds ''okay i'll hang up the phone i'm with two minutes by your house okay?'' i smile and walk over to Lylian and hug her from behind. ''okay we'll see you than Sara'' i say and Lylian hangs up the phone. she turns around and i see the sparks in her eyes. ''you look handsome'' we jump on the bed and enjoy our last minute alone with music. 

after 5 minutes we hear the door bell ring. Lylian jumps of the bed and sais you wait here okay i want to suprise her. i nod and say: ''okay go hurry up and get her'' she smiles and hurries out the door. she almost slams the door shut and i lay on the bed for a couple more minutes. i hear Sara down stairs chatting with Lylian eventually i hear Lylian say: ''close your eyes okay i'm going to lead you upstairs'' and i hear Sara responding : ''are you crazy?! first you blow up my ears drums and now you want to lead me up stairs?'' i hear Lylian laugh ''just trust me okay'' i hear them both walk up the stairs and Lylian knocks on the door so i know she is there with Sara. ''okay Sara i'm going to open the door aand i'm going to count to 0 and you can open your eyes'' i step off the bed and walk to the mirror and ajust my hair and walk to the center of the room so Sara can see me clearly. i look at Lylian and give her the thumbs up. ''okay here we go...3....2....5....4...3...'' i see Sara give Lylian a soft smack on her arm ''don't tease me i want to see her she laughes'' Lylian laughs as well and continues ''okay sorry i wanted to tease you, okay here we go again'' she stickes out her to me and again she goes on ''3...2...1...0 you can look''' Sara opens her eyes. first it takes a bit of time to ajust to the bright light but when she sees me she is so suprised she freezes for a bit. after a minutes she screams just like Lylian did. she runs at me and gives me hug ''omg you look just like one of my normal guy friends and your hot'' she smiles at me and we laugh. ''i  don't even think they will reconize me'' i laugh. ''we need to see if that is true but we need to go to them now we are already a bit late and they are waiting at them mall'' me and Lylian nod, and we head out the door. this will be a new and nerv wrecking experience, but here we go.

And now it continues: 

Me and Lylian walk next to each other while Sara leads the way. me and lylian don't go to the mall very often because we don't need anything from there so we had no idea where we where going. we just trusted Sara to lead us into the right direction. although that worried me most of my thoughts went to my wig and how i looked. the thoughts spooked through my head i wasn't good enough as a boy and would never pass. of course i shouldn't worry me but it botherd me alot. eventually i felt a warm hand on my own hand. it was Lylian. she looked at me and i knew she knew i was worried about how i looked. she gave me a reasuring push and wispered to me: ''you look great don't worry to much what other people think about you okay. if your happy that is all what matters okay'' i sighed and shaked my head that i understood her.  

After a couple minutes we finally see them mall. Sara started to walk even faster than before. she really wanted to go to her friends. it's weird because she never acted like that around us. i shacked the thouhts off and me and Lylian speeded up our steps so we could keep up with her. we entered the mall and a little further we saw a couple guys waving at us and suddenly Sara started running. me and Lylian looked at each other confused because this was not Sara. at the most she would walk fast but, she hated running and never ever wanted to try to run to us if we wanted to do somthing. 

Me and Lylian started to follow her with a slight run. eventually we got to the group of boys and Sara. ''why did you run off like that'' Lylian almost exploded but she keped it because she knew she couldn't get mad about it. Sara looked at her like she had seen a ghost and turned her back to her and ignoring the quistion. ''so guys this is Sam and Lylian'' said Sara while grabbing a boys arm. i was so confused this wasn't Sara at all. most of the time she wasn't hanging on boys or even trying to seem cool but this was not Sara. she was trying to get attention from the boys while flirting with one of the group. me and Lylian saw this wasn't good at all but we ignored it and said hi to most of the guys. 

One of the guys really stood out of the others. he had white short/long hair, with a cute blue/gray hoodie with little cat ears. it was kinda adorable to look at him. he seemed like the guy who was caring but only said somthing to really good friends. i wonder what brought him here. suddenly a guy swings his arm around my shoulder like guys do. ''hey little one my name is Alex, i'm a friend of that shy basterd over there. i see you have been staring at him for a little while'' i was a bit shocked he was so open and comfortable with a stranger, and he saw me staring at his friend how embarressing but i liked that he was open and not to akward about it eventually continued. ''if you want i can introduce you to Aaron if you want of course, we will be hanging around here for a little while before going to get games'' hmm... i thought we would go straight to the buy games but this didn't bother me. it can take a little longer and it could be boring but i could meet someone new as well. ''hey Alex, my name is...'' Alex interupted me: ''your Sam, i know that cuty over there told me'' he pointed at Sara that was hanging over another guy. ''ah you mean Sara'' Alex shaked his head and continued his sentance ''so you want to meet Aaron. it is time for him to make a new friend as well so this wouldn't hurt'' i smile at Alex and say: ''yah that sounds great. he seems like a nice enough guy'' Alex still had his arm around me and walked to Aaron. Alex was way bigger than i was but he was nice. he had a nice energy around him. he was very spontanious and energetic. but for the most part he was friendly and very honest. i think he would become a great friend. ''so do you mind me asking somthing?'' i asked while looking at Alex, he looked at me and smiled ''yah sure, what do you want to know little one?'' i smiled back at him. ''so this is like the first time i met some new people and been in the mall as well....i wonder if you would like to be my friend and hang around somthimes with me, Lylian and Aaron?'' Alex laughed and gave me the biggest smile ever. ''of course i wouldn't mind, do you want me to give you my phone number and i get yours?'' i shaked my head and so before we had spoken to Aaron i had a new friend in my phone. 

We walked over to Aaron, he looked a bit weirded out because Alex brought someone to him. of course i was shy as well and i had no idea what to do but, i should give it a try. it had been years for me, having a new friend was new to me. it was hard to make new friends but this is my first try. ''yoooo Aaron, you haven't met Sam yet one of the new guys around here'' Aaron looked up at me and exzamend my face and instanlly looked happier. ''Hey i'm Aaron'' he said with a little smile. ''okay Aaron try to make a new friend okay he is pretty cool'' Aaron waved Alex away and before Alex left he wisperd in my ear ''i know you where staring at him. mabey you like him mabey not but he likes guys so you have a shot and your pretty cute for a guy as well so good luck'' before i could say anything Alex walked towards the other group with 4 guys, Sara and Lylian. they where happily chatted over there while me and Aaron where sitting a little farther from the group. ''So your one of the new guys'' i shaked my head that i was. ''you know you should stay away from Sara'' i looked suprised because this was one of  the things i didn't expect him to say. ''what do you mean?'' Aaron sight. ''mabey she is not like that around you and your friend over there but, Sara is not as good as she seems'' i wondered what he meant so i asked further ''what has she done that is that bad?'' Aaron sat a little closer to me than a second ago. ''okay this is between you and me okay?'' ''okay i'll keep this to myself'' Aaron took a deep breath ''so Sara isn't the goody two shoes, most of the time she hangs out with the guys over there. she tries to get into there pants and tries to rob them from there money so she can have what she wanted. i warned Alex about that and since a while he has been trying to stay away from her. have you mabey seen some weird stuff around her?'' now that he tells me about that i started to see that it was true. she always got stuff out of nowhere. i always asked where she got it but she said it where gifts from her rich dad. of course it where very expencive things like new clothes, necklases and more but after a while i gave up asking where the things came from. ''now that you tell me about it yes, she always had stuff from her ''dad'' but i doubt that is true, but why do you tell me about this?'' Aaron smiled at me ''look you seem like a great person to be around and she likes guys like you, i don't want someone like you getting hurt from a friend like that'' ah that explains it. ''i guess thank you for that. do you mind me telling Lylian at the end of the day?'' he looked at me weird like he didn't know her. ''the new girl a friend i came with other than Sara'' Aarons face went from confused to understaning and that was nice. ''yah you should tell her that as well, she should know anyway you seem cool but, anyway what about you and me go get some games for ourself when they go to the store?'' Aaron gave me a smal cute smile and it mellted my hear. i smiled back at him and answered ''yah seems great'' we became silent for a little while and than i had the courage to ask him: ''he would you mind giving each other our phone numbers?'' he smiled back and said: ''yah awesome, it would be cool to chat with you and getting to know you better'' after a minute with giving him my phone number and he giving me his we where done and continued talking. 

After 15 minutes the group screamed at us they where going to get games and so me and Aaron went after them to go try out some games and of course get some ourself.

To Be Continued: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQaNaarNMS8

Hey Guy's,

So it's been a bit of a long since i have posted anything. it's been a bit of chaos right now. i'm trying to find myself and practise with my art alot. i don't really know why i haven't posted anything (art or story) i guess i was just out of it. i had some stuff going around and i guess i felt it wasn't really good enough to post. i made some drawings that i'm proud of but not really feel like it is good enough to show. mabey you Guys can tell me? anyway i wanted to write some stuff of of me and hope you enjoy the continueing story of: New Friends (part 2) 

enjoy ^_^

Last Time: 

she took a deep breath and continued her story ''so Sam walked in and tried to sit with us but then every family appeared, they laughed at me. the looked at me like i did a bad job of keeping Sam away from being a transgender. they pointed and laughed like i did somthing wrong and eventually had to rip of the clothes Sam was wearing'' i was shocked. my sisters dream litterly told her it wasn't okay for me to be transgender. ''YOU WHAT?! are you insane Wendy. do you think this is okay? you find it that terrible for me being this? or would you rather have me hide that i am transgender and say i'm just a tomboy? your insane'' i was so mad at her. what did she think. that i was a wrong part of the family. my mom was in shock as well and tried to grab my hand so i couldn't get away. 

I ran upstairs to my room. i need to find a plan to get out. finally i knew it, my window i trew my wig and purse into my bagpack and put it on. luckly i could lock my door and climb out of the window because it was close to the roof so i could climb down the roof into a tree in the back yard, and so i escaped my home and ran to Lilyan.

When i arrived at her house she was suprised to see me this early and a bit exhausted. ''did you run here? you look a bit exhausted'' i shacked my head. ''no i escaped from my window to get out of my house'' she looked at me in shock. ''why did you try to escape your home, it's your home right you shouldn't have to run from that right?'' ''yah that is true, it's my sister she dreamed over me and that it was bad i was a transgender and rather have a normal sister or that is how she told it, it just made me mad'' Lylian looked at me and i saw she understood me and gave me hug. ''hey she is probebly just confused give her some time and for you and me and Sara let's have some fun today okay, did you bring the wig with you?'' i smiled and nodded to let her know i did. ''than let's make of this an awesome day!'' she said with the biggest smile on her face. 

And Now It Continues:

Lylian always seems to understand where i was coming from even if i was mad for the wrong reasons, or if i was mad about nothing. she always smiled and said it would be okay, that i will talk it out with the other people and i agree (somthimes. it takes some time to realize as well) anyway she always was supportive just like Sara. speaking of wich where was she? ''hey Lylian where is Sara? are we going to her place or is she coming our way?'' Lylian who was searching for an outfit for some reason in her closet turned her head to me after she grabbed a T-Shirt and let i fall on her head. she was clumsy but she giggled a bit and continued. she walked over to the bed and layed the T-shirt on there while saying to me: ''Sara is coming to us. i texted her a second ago to tell her you where already here so she told me she would come our way because it would be faster'' i nodded and walked over to the bed while i set my ass on her bed next to the T-shirt that Lylian layed on there.

I looked at the shirt it was a pretty weird shirt for Lylian to have. it was a dark green shirt with an design of wings on it. for Lylian it was way to ''boyisch'' as how she calls it. she already walked back to the closet to search for some other things. a second later without any warning Lylian trows a tanktop at my head. i smile and say in a sarcastic way ''you where aming for the cat wheren't you?'' Lylian turns around and sticks out her tounge to me and i react back the same way. i look a bit closer at the tanktop. it is not a normal tanktop i have ever seen. it is way tighter than they sell at any store. i look at Lylian who closes her closet door and walks over to me. ''Lylian why do you have a shirt like that? and what is this for tanktop? i have never seen one like this'' Lylian sits next to me on the bed and giggles. ''this is for you as a present for being such a good friend the last two years'' i look confused at Lylian and she continues.''this a t-shirt and this is a binder'' she gives me a smirk ''i know what a shirt is but what is a binder?'' Lylian smiles and sais: ''a binder is a top i guess just like others but it's a bit different, this top flatens your chest so you can't see those two bumpers of yours'' i laugh over how she explains it and give her a little push. ''thanks goof'' Lylian smiles at me and gives me a big hug. 

suddenly we hear the ring tone of Lylians phone. Lylian looks around and sees her phone laying on the other side of the room. ''can you get my phone please? you can chance your clothes as well than'' i smile give her a push, and grab the t-shirt, and binder and walk over to her phone where i grab my wig as well. ''throw the phone Sam you can chance right away than'' while i'm standing infront of the closet with her buzzing and noisy phone i look at her suprised. ''your sure?'' she nods and i throw the phone. my heart races, i hope the phone doesn't hit the ground but it savely lands in the hands of Lylian and she imeaditly picks up the phone. 

I don't pay attention anymore to what Lylian is doing. i get excited because i can finally put on my outfit. i pull off my shirt and bra and she my top in the mirror infront of the closet. yep those are mine. i sigh for a second and look at the binder she bought for me. i grab the binder while i lay the shirts i have in my hands on a chair. i put on the binder and look at myself. i turn to my side and see how flat my chest is. i smile and admire how the binder worked so well. it is very tight but it is amezing and i feel confident. but i miss somthing... i think for a second... music i miss music. if i dress myself i always have music on. i walk to Lylians computer. luckly it isn't locked and the tab is open on Lylians dating site. before my curiousity what Lylian is doing on there i open a new tab, and search for some music and i find some awesome songs from someone i lissen to alot.

I put on the music and i see Lylian is suprised but she continues talking with the person on the phone. i walk back to the mirror while lissening to some awesome music. i put on the shirt and the wig. i haven't looked in the mirror yet but i'm about to. i close my eyes, turn around and count to twenty on the beat of the music. 18...19......20... i open my eyes and the person i see in the mirror is stunning. you can't even tell it was a girl. i freak out a bit because i look exactly how i wanted to look. i turn my head to Lylian and she is looking at her feet. eventually she feels my eyes staring at her and she looks at me. she is silent for a second, and i hear Sara on the other end conserened if she is still there. after a second Lylian begins to scream in excitment and drops the phone that on excident goes on speaker. Lylian runs of the bed and jumps into my arms. ''your so handsome and cute, you look awesome Sam'' i look blushing at Lylian in my arms and say ''thank you'' softly. 

after a couple minutes of cuddeling i hear Sara. ''LYLIAN!!! why did you have to blow up my ears?!?!?''  i see Lylian rushing over to the phone. ''sorry Sara, i just saw Sam in her outfit for the first time it's unbelievible, you should hurry up'' i hear Sara giggling and she responds ''okay i'll hang up the phone i'm with two minutes by your house okay?'' i smile and walk over to Lylian and hug her from behind. ''okay we'll see you than Sara'' i say and Lylian hangs up the phone. she turns around and i see the sparks in her eyes. ''you look handsome'' we jump on the bed and enjoy our last minute alone with music. 

after 5 minutes we hear the door bell ring. Lylian jumps of the bed and sais you wait here okay i want to suprise her. i nod and say: ''okay go hurry up and get her'' she smiles and hurries out the door. she almost slams the door shut and i lay on the bed for a couple more minutes. i hear Sara down stairs chatting with Lylian eventually i hear Lylian say: ''close your eyes okay i'm going to lead you upstairs'' and i hear Sara responding : ''are you crazy?! first you blow up my ears drums and now you want to lead me up stairs?'' i hear Lylian laugh ''just trust me okay'' i hear them both walk up the stairs and Lylian knocks on the door so i know she is there with Sara. ''okay Sara i'm going to open the door aand i'm going to count to 0 and you can open your eyes'' i step off the bed and walk to the mirror and ajust my hair and walk to the center of the room so Sara can see me clearly. i look at Lylian and give her the thumbs up. ''okay here we go...3....2....5....4...3...'' i see Sara give Lylian a soft smack on her arm ''don't tease me i want to see her she laughes'' Lylian laughs as well and continues ''okay sorry i wanted to tease you, okay here we go again'' she stickes out her to me and again she goes on ''3...2...1...0 you can look''' Sara opens her eyes. first it takes a bit of time to ajust to the bright light but when she sees me she is so suprised she freezes for a bit. after a minutes she screams just like Lylian did. she runs at me and gives me hug ''omg you look just like one of my normal guy friends and your hot'' she smiles at me and we laugh. ''i  don't even think they will reconize me'' i laugh. ''we need to see if that is true but we need to go to them now we are already a bit late and they are waiting at them mall'' me and Lylian nod, and we head out the door. this will be a new and nerv wrecking experience, but here we go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xk0Y0WoQ1AI

Hey Guy's,

today i wanted to write a special story about friendship that warms all your hearts and brings hope to the people who have given up on friendship like i once did. i hope this will make you guy's happy ^_^

The story:

There we go again. it's my alarm that is yelling trough my room that i need to get up. i always take a while to get up and i hate when the alarm goes of but who doesn't right? for me it take a half hour to get out of my bed and get dressed, and indeed after a half hour of naping i get out. my alarm has gone of around 13 times right now like every day, and of course my sister is cranky because she hates when i take so long to shut the thing up. 

Today i start a first day for my new summer vacation this year. this year has been rough and i have been trough alot of chances. not just working hard but also dicovering myself. this year i discoverd the term Transgender, of course i heard of it but never really searched for the term. i was shocked how much i related to it and i felt the same way like the explaination said. i felt like a boy in a girls body, so this year i wanted to go full up and try to dress more like a guy and feel more comfortable than as one of the skinny make-up girls who always walked around my school. i wanted to be me, but i didn't want to do sercheary the idea doesn't sound good to me so i just look the same but wear stuff i feel okay in and do the things i wanted intsead of what others wanted. 

The annoying part is telling people. some friends said i was just a tomboy and didn't believe when i said i was transgender. i tried to explain what i felt but they couldn't understand it at all, so i desided to ignore them for a while. a real friend would believe you, atleast i think so, atleast with such things. and some friends where awesome and supported me full on. i wanted to hug them so badly when they believed me. of course i still looked like a girl but they understood me completly and i promised them to have a fun day out and than one of my friends grabbed one of there wigs and shoved it into my hands.

'here you can have this' she said with a big smile on her face. i looked at the wig and asked why she gave it to me. she said to me: when we where little it was a to big for you but you loved walking around with that thing and always tried to be more manly so now you know you are transgender i want to give you a chance to explore everything and be a guy whenever you want to be one' i was so suprised and gave her the biggest hug i could give. she was one of my best friends  i had and she always understood me so well. so now i could even go out looking like a boy and that felt awesome and another friend made it even better. 

She grabbed me and pulled me to the side, she looked at me with a big smile. of course i didn't trust her because she was pretty good with mischief and always tried to somthing that could cause her trouble but she was an awesome friend to have around. she said: i don't know if you want to tell the others but i'm going out with some guys to go shopping for games i wondered if you wanted to come with us, you could wear the wig if you want or not it's your choice but i know you want to belong in such a group so i want to invite you, mabey we could take Lilyan with us if you want?' i look her with the biggest smile i ever had and huged her. ''of course i want to go with you, and yah we should invite Lilyan to go with us than i atleast have a save space'' we both agreed we should take her with us so we asked her when everyone was out of the room and she was happy to come with us as well. 

And today is the day that me and my friends are  going to be with that group to test it and go out. i of course was nerves but now is no need to worry about it. i am just awake and i already have a grumpy sister walking around the house. it's always funny to see her like that in the morning especially even if she is already a grumpy cat in the morning seeing her annoyed at me is always funny to hear. she is like a flute ketle, if she gets frustrated she doesn't say anything she just makes a high peached voice and grouwls at me and than walks away angry. her cheeks always are bigger and red it looks a bit like a chimpmunk wtih nuts in his mouth, and her walk is cute to see. like a toddler walking away angry it's somthing you can't take serious and i laugh at. 

But for now she is okay although i would love to make her frustrated right now i have breakfast on my mind. My mom always wakes up early to make somthing special and nothing is better than your mom's cooking and smelling it trough the whole house. of course she had some disasters like the patato cake she tried to make with just thinking, she blew up the oven and the house smelled for an month like burned patatoes. it was funny when she walked with a black dust on her clothes and face at me and said: ''i might have blown up th oven'' i loved the face she made. i helped her clean up the mess but i still can't discover how she managed to do that. but this morning luckly doesn't smell like burned patatoes but blackberry pancakes. it's her speciallty. she makes regular pancakes and puts blackberry's in them and somthimes she tries out other fruites so it's always a suprise what she made in the morning. 

This time the whole house was filled up with the smell and i was already drewling when i stepped out my room. of course when i was done my sister was as well. so we walked downstairs toghter, while she was trying to tickle me on the stairs i tried to run while that wasn't to smart because i triped and roled down the stairs. i landed good and nothing was hurting but the only thing i could do is laugh. of course my sister was shocked when i fel down but when she saw the big smile on my face she laughed as well. she helped me up and we both walked to the kitchen. there was my mom still busy with making tons of pancakes for in the afternoon. ''goodmorning Sam and Wendy, did you two sleep well?'' i didn't even hear what she said and grabbed a plate of pancakes, they where still warm and that is how i love them. of course my sister hit me on the shoulder and gave me a look that i should answer. of course i needed to do that, but i wanted my pancakes. ''i slept okay, thanks mom'' my sister smiled at me and reacted finally as well ''i did as well although i had a weird dream'' my mom turned around and looked weird at my sister, '' can i know what it was about sweety?'' my sister looked at me weird and answered ''uhm.. yah sure'' i saw my sister wiggle on her chair and look at her legs. it was kind of weird to see her so nervous. the only thing that she could make her this nervous is when it's about someone else, and now i knew why she looked so weird at me before. 

'' so sweety are you going to tell your dream or do we have to wait until the sun goes down?'' she shaked her head and started to look only at our mom. ''so uhm.. yah this is kinda akward but i hope it doesn't make anyone mad.'' she looked at me and that started to tell further. ''so it stared like any normal dream i would have. i was at home and of course all of you where there. only Sam wasn't there.'' my mom looked at her weird and asked ''do you know why she wasn't there'' there it was again ''mom it's not she it's he or they'' my mom looked shocked at me and looked at the floor ''sorry honey i try to keep it in mind, but Wendy can you continue your story?'' my sister shaked he head and continued like my mom asked '' so we where all eating and having a great time with the family until Sam walked in.'' i started to get a bit frustrated ''what do you mean until i walked in?! what is that supposed to mean'' my sister looked shocked at me like she had done somthing terrible and she never should have told us.

she took a deep breath and continued her story ''so Sam walked in and tried to sit with us but then every family appeared, they laughed at me. the looked at me like i did a bad job of keeping Sam away from being a transgender. they pointed and laughed like i did somthing wrong and eventually had to rip of the clothes Sam was wearing'' i was shocked. my sisters dream litterly told her it wasn't okay for me to be transgender. ''YOU WHAT?! are you insane Wendy. do you think this is okay? you find it that terrible for me being this? or would you rather have me hide that i am transgender and say i'm just a tomboy? your insane'' i was so mad at her. what did she think. that i was a wrong part of the family. my mom was in shock as well and tried to grab my hand so i couldn't get away. 

I ran upstairs to my room. i need to find a plan to get out. finally i knew it, my window i trew my wig and purse into my bagpack and put it on. luckly i could lock my door and climb out of the window because it was close to the roof so i could climb down the roof into a tree in the back yard, and so i escaped my home and ran to Lilyan.

When i arrived at her house she was suprised to see me this early and a bit exhausted. ''did you run here? you look a bit exhausted'' i shacked my head. ''no i escaped from my window to get out of my house'' she looked at me in shock. ''why did you try to escape your home, it's your home right you shouldn't have to run from that right?'' ''yah that is true, it's my sister she dreamed over me and that it was bad i was a transgender and rather have a normal sister or that is how she told it, it just made me mad'' Lylian looked at me and i saw she understood me and gave me hug. ''hey she is probebly just confused give her some time and for you and me and Sara let's have some fun today okay, did you bring the wig with you?'' i smiled and nodded to let her know i did. ''than let's make of this an awesome day!'' she said with the biggest smile on her face. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8J85Mkdm2Y

Hey Guys,

So last week i have been on a trip and i wanted to talk about a place where i have been and that made a real infloance in my life and i wanted to to share this story with you all because it's inportant. 

So last week i was in Berlin for a trip so i and other people could learn more about the history there. I already am a History nerd so to speak and i am intressted in what happend with alot of things especially stuff about world war II. at the end of the trip we went to Camp Sachsenhausen. for people that don't know that is a camp where the jews, gay people, people who where against Hitler and fought for there goals and so maney more people where brought. some where let free in the beginning but there where also people executed or tortured. 

Camp Sachsenhausen isn't a place for people who don't understand what happend because this is a real place where really bad things happend. when i first saw the gate where the words ''Arbeit macht frei' stood i felt already bad. when i walked in instanly felt a strong force. it felt like people where puching on my chest and it was hard to breath. 

I have seen the Barracks where the people slept in. i saw the original beds and cloths and shoes from the people that where found there. i even saw one of the original prison suites they had to wear there. on that point i was trying to calm myself down. i even have red some letters from a 12 year old saying she was scared to die but they wouldn't let them. it was heart breaking to read such a thing. or from a man who had to bring all the burned people had to dig up and burn again. i can't imagen how they must have felt.

After i saw the Barracks i saw the punshment Barracks where you where put if you did the wrong thing or a 
Resistance warrior. the chambers where smal and some had dark rooms where people where put on there own chaned down to the floor. in some chambers there where plates where a country was on and was explained who was there and what happend to them. like some where tortured and some killed and more awful things. two parts where destroyed of the building but one part was still standing and i have seen that. 

after that we went to the otherside of the Camp where there where memorials for all the countries that people had here. i saw there where little stones on the memorials and apperaintly that is a jewish tradition so from respect i layed two stones. one on the memorial for my country and one on the mass graves. 

after i read all the signs for each country and saw the mass graves, i went to a little house. in that house they kept all the dead body's and some doctors experimented on those body's and that is sick. i saw the chambers underground where they stored them. they where old rooms with old white tiles and low to the ground there where taps so they could get rid of the blood (probebly) after i saw the chambers and the rooms above i had to get out. i couldn't take it anymore and even now it's bothering me. when i was out the camp  sat down underneath a roof and cried. some tears fel down my cheeks and that doesn't happen often. 

I can't believe such horrible things can happen to people and i always have heard stories and seen stuf about those kind of Camps but now i walked trough one where real people died or where executed. where real people where hold captive and where scared. the feeling that i had there i can feel it right now. for my life it is was a really inportant part of history and we need to see what happend so it will not happen that way again. 

thank you for reading this if you did. i hope i could tell you somthing you where intressted in. this was life changing for me and with sharing this with you i hope i changed a little part of your life as well. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qj9oFQNAdeQ